Valentine’s Day can be beautiful, but this ritual is not about romance. It is about reverence. The kind of love that does not need to be earned, proven, or performed.
In many lineages, self love was never a trend. It was devotion. It was the act of tending your energy like a sacred flame, so you could move through the world softer, steadier, and more open.
This is a simple five step ritual you can return to any time you feel scattered, overstimulated, or simply ready to come home to yourself.
If you would like to browse everything in one place, explore all offerings here: All Our Magical Offerings.
What you are creating
This ritual works because it meets you on three levels:
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Physical where touch and warmth signal safety to the body
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Energetic where scent and smoke shift the atmosphere and clear what is not yours
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Spiritual where intention, fire, and cacao create a doorway to your heart
You do not need perfect conditions. You only need willingness.
Before you begin
Choose a time window that feels doable.
- 10 minutes is enough
- 20 minutes is ideal
- 45 minutes becomes a full ceremony
If you can, do these three tiny preparations:
- Put your phone on silent.
- Pour a glass of water.
- Choose one word for the ritual, such as soften, receive, truth, or ease.
Step 1: Body oil as anointing
In ancient ritual, oil is used to anoint. Not to improve the body, but to bless it. It says, this form is sacred. This skin is worthy of care.
When you apply oil slowly, your nervous system receives a clear message: you are safe now.
You may like to try
Use a ritual oil you love from our collection: Shemana Crystalline Elixirs.
How to do it
Warm a small amount of oil between your palms. Start at your shoulders and work down your arms, chest, belly, hips, legs, and feet. Go slowly. Where you rush is often where you disconnect.
Ancient style intention
I return to my body with love.
Step 2: Room clearing spray to shift the field
Many traditions cleanse the space before they open anything sacred. Not because the world is “bad,” but because energy collects. Stress lingers. Other people’s moods cling.
A clearing mist draws a line between what came before and what you are choosing now.
You may like to try
Choose your favourite mist from: Shemana Crystalline Elixirs.
How to do it
Mist the room in a slow circle. Then mist above your head and around your body like a soft energetic rinse. If you can, open a window for one minute to let the old energy move out.
Ancient style intention
Only love may remain here.
Step 3: Beeswax candle to call in the fire element
Fire is presence. Fire is truth. Fire is the gentle courage of staying with yourself.
A beeswax candle brings a warm, living light that makes a space feel held. It marks the moment as sacred, not ordinary.
You may like to try
Choose a size that suits your ritual length: 100% Pure Beeswax Candles.
How to do it
Light the candle slowly. Watch the flame for three breaths. Let your shoulders drop. Let your jaw soften.
Ancient style intention
I kindle my own light.
Safety note
Never leave a candle unattended.
Step 4: Incense as breath made visible
Across cultures, incense is used to carry prayer. Smoke is the visible form of breath. It slows the mind, deepens the body, and signals to your senses that you have entered ritual space.
You may like to try
Explore our incense and burning rituals here: Ritual Incense.
How to do it
Light the tip, let it catch, then gently blow it out. Move the smoke through the corners of your room, then bring it toward your heart. Let this be a bridge into stillness.
Ancient style intention
My breath returns me to the present.
Step 5: Cacao as heart medicine
Ceremonial cacao has been honoured for centuries as a heart opening plant ally. In ritual, cacao is not used to “fix” you. It is used to bring you back to what is already true beneath the noise.
You may like to try
Choose your cacao size:
Optional add on
If you like to pair your cacao with functional mushrooms, explore: Mason’s Mushrooms 100g Superfeast.
How to do it
Prepare your cacao slowly. Stir with presence. Before your first sip, place one hand on your heart and say:
Show me how to love myself more honestly.
Sip. Pause. Listen.
Important note
Cacao and medicinal mushrooms can be powerful. If you are pregnant, breastfeeding, sensitive to stimulants, or managing a medical condition or medication, check with a qualified health practitioner first.
Closing the ritual
This is the part most people skip. Try not to. Closing teaches your system that you can complete a cycle, and that you are safe to open and return.
Choose one closing action:
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Heart vow
Hand on heart, speak one sentence: I choose myself with gentleness.
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Gratitude sealing
Name three things you appreciate about yourself, even if they feel small.
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Future anchor
Write one tiny promise you can actually keep tomorrow.
Then blow out the candle with gratitude.
How to turn this into a weekly practice
If you want this to become your signature ritual, keep it simple:
- Once a week: all five steps
- On hard days: clearing mist, candle, cacao
- On busy days: oil on hands and heart, one deep breath
Consistency is what makes it sacred.
Shop the ritual
To build your self love ritual kit, start here and choose what you feel most drawn to: All Our Magical Offerings.
